To Be The Most Authentic Version Of Yourself Is To Be The Best Version Of Yourself

 To Be The Most Authentic Version Of Yourself Is To Be The Best Version Of Yourself

Looking around the heart of the city, it’s easy to see that being “authentic” is something worth bragging about. Be it food, drink or clothing, vendors know that people want the original — the real deal.

There’s something about that word “authentic” that evokes a homely, warming feeling, but I think, too, that there’s a sense of real, wholesome value in it. The word was dancing around in my head and led to me explore its meaning in terms of people: How authentic are we? Are we afraid of being authentic?

Why are we not boasting our original individuality, too? Trawling through shops, we often seek out the originals and the authenticity that they promote. We know it’s likely to be the best version.

Sometimes, we just don’t want to settle for the cheap, knock-off versions of things, but when it comes to our identities, are we choosing to settle?

Growing up, consistent advice given was to be yourself. Dr. Seuss put it perfectly when he wrote, “Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive that is youer than you.”

I wanted to be just about anyone else I could possibly be, but the idea of being happy to simply be me always resonated as a wonderful way of living. It remained out of my grasp for years as I grew to be more and more lost. While being sound advice, I think actually being yourself is, in practice, a lot more challenging.

We can put on a multitude of masks, shrouding our authentic selves in layers of pretense, falseness and people pleasing. It’s a battle of either hiding from the world or putting on an act and being something you’re not.

I have done a bit of both and it never worked out. Hiding away stops anyone from really getting to know you, and I promise, you are worth knowing!

Being something you’re not always ends in disaster because people will see through it. The more you stray away from who you really are, the more those feelings of being lost will envelope you.

Valuing authenticity is not automatic and acquiring the confidence to put yourself out there stirs up a lot of vulnerability and discomfort. However, it’s truly worth it.

Honest self-discovery is the path to feeling good about being you. Get to know yourself, what you believe and what makes you different. It could be the way you giggle at inappropriate times, the way you like things to be in perfect order, or always make terrible jokes.

It could be your family, your experiences or your past that has shaped who you are. Difficulties or triumphs, they all happen for a reason and are yours from which to learn from.

Try to shake off the safety blankets that prevent you from being real. I’m not saying you should ditch makeup or cosmetic things that make you feel good about yourself, but things that aren’t allowing you to shine have to go.

It might be saying what you think rather than agreeing with the general consensus. Or, it might mean dancing like no one’s watching — even if they are — just because the desire to do it is burning in your feet.

It could be trying something new, even if you’re the only one who wants to do it. It could be using other methods to tame social anxiety rather than alcohol or drugs. If you’re afraid you’re not confident or fun enough, you need to find new ways to feel better that come from within.

Tell your stories proudly and share your experiences without editing them first. Keep the details real and unfiltered and the edges rough because imperfection is beautiful.

Express yourself in whatever way makes you feel raw and exposed. Be the original, authentic person that everyone should strive to be.

Courtesy: Elite Daily


Bounce Back To A Better You: 7 Ways To Use Your Pain As Motivational Strength

Bounce Back To A Better You: 7 Ways To Use Your Pain As Motivational Strength

You are a compilation of your past experiences.

There have been amazing times, awful times and lots of things in between. We try to have positive moments all the time, but it doesn’t always happen that way. We often define broken hearts, crushed dreams and other obstacles as setbacks and nothing more.

In reality, though, these so-called challenges actually help us reconsider our current life path, and if we let them, may help us make life changes for the better.

But what about those tough, gut-wrenching situations you that you find little or no joy in? The fact that you’re here, reading this sentence, means you’ve survived and that is something to be celebrated.

You’ve probably heard that time heals all wounds. In your experience, has this always been true? Even if it has, what do you do until that time finally comes?

We cannot just wait and hope for things to get better. If we want to move forward with our lives, we need to at least try to make progress. How do we get out of that slump, though, when we lose out on our dream job in the last round of interviews? Or if we go through a breakup?

They key is to examine yourself, look at the world around you and power forward:

1. Acknowledge your new self.

You may have defined yourself as one way in the past, but now that you’ve gone through a certain setback, you likely see yourself in a different light. Don’t be afraid to recognize your feelings. Pay attention to how they affect you throughout the day.

You may not realize it, but just like lifting weights at the gym, both your physical body and your soul are becoming stronger by carrying this burden.

The first time you lift a heavy weight, it’s pretty miserable, but five gym visits later, the original weight is now a lot easier to carry. Hopefully you won’t have to go through the pain again, but if you do, you’re now more prepared.

2. Take care of something.

Whether it’s your friend, your cousin, pet or even a plant, try to help out some type of living being. Even just a slight increase in responsibility can give additional value to your life and give comfort to others around you, as well.

Take care of a dog that is super happy to see you each day, water a plant that needs you to survive or volunteer at a shelter.

If you’re not sure where to begin, start by giving a little extra attention to those around you. If he or she is going through a difficult time him or herself, hear this person out and try to offer support. Anticipate his or her needs and show that you care.

3. Remember that misery loves company.

Knowing that someone else has gone through a similar experience to our own can help benefit both people involved. Often we may feel like we’re alone while dealing with an issue, but when we come across another person who has gone through something comparable, we suddenly open up.

This conversation helps us (and usually said person) feel at least a little better. Talk to your coworkers, friends or classmates about your issue and they may tell you of someone they know who’s in a similar state. Or, join a support group and make friends there.

Once you finally connect with someone, allow him or her to help you. Make sure to return the favor to someone else in the future.

4. Get creative.

So your pain has transformed you in some ways, but how exactly? Do you see the world differently, or even see yourself differently?

How can you relate to the world in a way you’ll be understood? Evolve yourself into the person you want to be. If you’re still set on a goal that didn’t work out the first time, try to find another way to achieve that goal.

5. Find an open door.

Another saying you may have heard is that when one door closes, another opens. Ask yourself if any new opportunities have opened up since your setback.

Does the extra time you have not focusing on your original goal give you more time to pursue something else? You may not find any fully open doors, but maybe just a crack in a door that you can then open later, once you have more confidence or expertise in a certain area.

6. See the good in others.

This may be difficult, especially if you’ve been let down, abandoned or rejected by people in the past. But I believe that everyone has something good, usually something great at his or her core, even if it is covered by something that seems questionable.

With anyone you find to be particularly challenging to deal with, focus on one good part of his or her character, or one good thing you have seen this person do. If you truly have not seen anything good, then hope and trust that there’s something good to come.

7. See the good in yourself.

Own who you are; be proud of what you have overcome and be excited for what’s ahead. Know that you are strong and others will surely see your strength too.

Tell yourself three things each day that you like about yourself and focus on these good qualities. Carry these positive thoughts with you throughout your day.

Inspire yourself to achieve more than you thought possible, and you will be an inspiration to others, maybe without realizing it.

Courtesy: Elite Daily

The Pain Of Breaking Up With Someone Who Only Ever Existed In Your Head

The Pain Of Breaking Up With Someone Who Only Ever Existed In Your Head

In the past year, I’ve had about four boyfriends. I know that seems like a lot and most of you are wondering how that’s even possible (especially when I write about being single all the time). Well, here’s my secret: None of these boys actually know we’re dating.

As hard as it is to admit to myself, these relationships have largely taken place in my head, grown out of mild flirtations and a few drunk hookups. If we’re getting technical, the actual number of boyfriends I’ve had in the past year would be zero. But what fun is that?

When a friend recently asked me if I’m seeing anyone, I actually had to pause and rethink my answer. Saying that I’m outwardly together with someone in real life would pose as a blatant lie; however, in the realm of my mind, it was a different story.

Inside my head I was very much emotionally involved with a mutual friend named Jake* (*I’ve changed his name because this would be remarkably embarrassing if he found out the kind of storyline I devised for us) who, while I knew was interested in me as well (we had sporadically kissed a few times), hadn’t really progressed to full-on dating territory.

“I was hooking up with Jake for a little bit. But I don’t think it’s going anywhere, he’s super frustrating,” I replied, mentally categorizing this as a three on the lying scale. We had hooked up, we just weren’t that serious.

“How so?” my friend inquired.

“Well, there’s a lot of back and forth that goes on between us. He hasn’t explicitly asked me out, but the attraction is there. He just, like, can’t understand when he’s upsetting me. Oh, also, don’t like, tell him I’m saying this. He kind of doesn’t know.” I took a big sip of the cayenne cocktail and prayed she wouldn’t tell Jake of the head games I had conjured up and proceeded to mentally torture myself over.

My friend wasn’t going to talk to him. She was more puzzled by the whole thing and I couldn’t blame her. I wasn’t in a real-life relationship with Jake; 72 percent of our interactions took place in my head and the other 28 percent was casually flirtatious fodder between us that I then sickly twisted and blew out of proportion because I am that pathetic and want to be alone with my thoughts rather than an actual male human for the rest of my life.

There I said it. It was now time to end this fantasy relationship that clearly wasn’t going to happen in real life. The only problem: How do you get over a boyfriend that largely existed inside your head?

It’s not like you can have this big blowout breakup scene. You don’t actually have any concrete reasons to be mad at him besides, “He didn’t give me enough attention,” which, yeah, makes sense because he doesn’t even know he’s dating you! You can’t say “he cheated on me” or “he doesn’t make time for me.”

There isn’t a talk about how to improve your struggles as a couple. You’re not a couple. You’re not even a “thing.”

You’re make-believe, a dreamt-up part of my imagination that I use to pretend I’m sleeping next to someone at night. And this is why breaking up with someone who only exists in your head is so hard: when you think about a person so much, he seems all-too real to you.

It’s kind of like when you have an intensely vivid dream about someone and the next day you see him in person. You feel like you were with him. You feel like you know him. And yet, that was all made up in your mind.

To the outside world, I was single. Inside my head, I was emotionally closed off, already in too deep with my own thoughts of my fake-boyfriend.

Jake and I had a super-exciting dating life. I was convinced we had a strong attraction one evening when he bought me a drink and none of my other friends, and naturally blew that gesture out of proportion when I smiled about it on my walk home.

He said things like, “I bet your sister is really cool,” which I then heard as, “I can’t wait until you introduce me to your sister.”

We rarely fought (obviously), but yet he always seemed to (naturally) let me down when I caught glimpses of him chatting up other girls at the bar. This is because you two aren’t actually dating, I had to remind myself.

I know this saga might raise a few eyebrows, friends might question my sanity, others will tout about how pathetic I am that I can’t hold down a real relationship or at least make the move and tell this guy that we’ve been seeing each other for three months and it’s finally time we see each other some place other than my brain.

But if we were to get together in real life, what would happen then? Would it live up to this hyped-up fantasy I’ve been building up inside me? Would he be the kind of boyfriend I already scripted him to be?

Perhaps, when you already have the mental drama to fulfill, you eventually become numb to the real thing.

So how was I to break up with Jake? Clearly it wasn’t going to work between us. I decided to stop seeing him both in person and in my head.

His presence as a constant visual reminder wasn’t helping to erase him from my mind. And no good could come out of me wanting someone that badly who didn’t want me back.

What was the appropriate response, though, to such a tragic ending? I couldn’t help but feel a little empty and down. There wasn’t anyone special to preoccupy my thoughts anymore. There wasn’t someone who I was dressing up for in hope I’d see him out that night.

I didn’t have that internal farce to fill me up or complain about when my girlfriends and I discussed our love lives. Even though we technically had never been boyfriend and girlfriend, a piece of me still felt like we had.

Aside from facing the cold, hard truth, the best solution to ending things with your mental fantasy, I believe, is to find someone who wants to be your reality.

Someone who you don’t need to obsess over in your head because he is right there in front of you, wanting you back. Let go of the people who won’t turn into anything more than a delusion — they might give you some artificial comfort, but they’re also holding you back from experiencing the true thing.

Eventually, I got over Jake, just like I had gotten over those other three “boyfriends.” I laughed at how ridiculous these fake relationships were and the stupid anguish they caused me when they didn’t really need to.

My friends didn’t stop making fun of me, though. Which I guess is a good thing because we all need a dose of reality now and then.

And I’ve learned a valuable lesson: Don’t dream about what other people can do for you, instead make it happen for yourself.

The Pain Of Being In Love With Someone You Can Never Be With

The Pain Of Being In Love With Someone You Can Never Be With

Love is a tricky thing. It varies in intensity and in the specificity of emotions. It is sometimes the most beautiful thing in the world and, at other times, it’s the most horrid thing we’ve ever come face-to-face with.

It’s odd how one thing could be the cause of so many contrary feelings. But that’s what makes love so beautiful – it’s the closest thing to perfection that exists in the world, the only thing that can easily and comfortably encompass both good and evil, beautiful and ugly.

It’s the closest thing to a flawless whole that man has ever claimed to have been part of.

When we think of love, we think of the happy kind of love, the kind that is the beginning of something beautiful – something that breathes life.

There is, however, another kind of love, a much darker and sadder kind of love. It’s the love one feels when one loves someone he or she can never and will never have.

It’s the kind of love that doesn’t signal the beginning of something beautiful, but rather the end of something that might have been beautiful, but will never amount to anything more than what it is.

Contrary to popular belief or popular wishful thinking, love doesn’t always end happily. It doesn’t always result in the joining of two people, the fusing of two lives into one.

Sometimes, on rare occasions, it results in the wedging apart of the two who love each other the most. You can love someone with all your soul and never get a chance to be with that person. Even worse, you can know that you love him or her, understanding there is no possibility that the two of you will ever be together.

Some people cannot and will not ever end up together, even if they do love each other. It’s a sad truth, but a truth, nonetheless.

The fact is, love is not enough. All those fairytales, all those stories and movies you’ve heard and watched growing up, lied to you. Love is never enough because love is not rational.

You hear that love is irrational all the time, yet you still hear the same people saying that love is enough to keep two people together.

Unfortunately, we live in a world governed by rationality, and while love may be irrational, and we may manage to make it work for some time, the real world always catches up with us and our irrational illusions dissipate into thin air.

Then we are left with reality and reality doesn’t always reason the way lovers do.

Some people don’t work out together. They have habits or beliefs that make it impossible to co-habitate with the person they love. There isn’t a couple out there that loves every little thing about one another.

Sure, they may find certain quirks cute or unique, but they don’t love them; they simply accept them. There are some people who have such habits, tendencies, or thinking patterns that really do make them incompatible with the other person.

The two may love each other fully, because remember, love isn’t rational, yet not be able to live and deal with each other forever. This is why relationships require compromise.

You’re not going to love everything about the person you are with, but you love enough about him or her to live with the things you don’t love. Not all people are willing to, or even able to, compromise. Sometimes it just doesn’t work, regardless of what our emotions tell us.

Compromising, of course, is a choice. You either choose to make it work or you choose not to. I believe this fully. As long as something doesn’t go against your nature, over time you can make it work. But there are still some cases when compromising isn’t enough.

Sometimes there are other reasons two people cannot and will not ever be together. In fact, this is usually the deciding factor of whether or not two lovers will be capable of spending their lives together: if they are able to forgive and forget.

Because love is as intense an emotion as one gets, it occasionally leads us to make poor choices – choices that are hurtful to the ones we love.

They may be poor calls of judgment, lies we told or things we said. When it comes to love, our pasts haunt us. We move from relationship to relationship, hauling all that luggage we managed to accumulate in our previous relationship.

Because lovers who can’t work together don’t like to accept this fact, they have a tendency of breaking up and getting back together repeatedly.

Each time they take a break from each other, they come back and try to start fresh. But the problem is, they’re still carrying all that luggage. And sooner or later, they start to unpack. All the demons come out.

When love scars, it cuts deep. The pain isn’t easily forgotten and usually cannot be willfully forgotten. When you hurt the woman you love enough, she won’t come back to you. And because you still love her, you wouldn’t take her back even if she asked you to.

You don’t trust yourself not to hurt her again and even if you did, she wouldn’t trust you not to hurt her again. Relationships are built on trust and you shattered her trust.

Chances are, you both have bruises that have never fully healed and likely will never fully heal. And that’s just something you decided that you’ll have to live with. Why?

Because you really don’t have any other options. You just hope that the two of you find others to love so you can think about each other less and so you don’t have to worry about her happiness anymore.

You wait in hopes that new love can take the place of the old — which it can. But that doesn’t mean you will ever stop loving each other. Some people will love each other until the day they die, spending the majority of their lives apart. And so is the darker side of love.

Courtesy: Elite-Daily

Does God Exist?

Whether God Exists Or Not?Richard Dawkins is challenging the idea that a Deistic God created the universe and set it in motion and then keeps aloof. In other words, according to him we believe in an absentee God who seems to be indifferent to what is happening in the world. But if He in fact does create individual souls ‘off and on’, then he should face the problem of evil that exists in the created universe in the form of sorrows and sufferings, injustice, exploitation, birth-based deformities. Why should there be any birth-based differences that make some more privileged than others?

Besides, aggressive atheists who deny the existence of God do so because believers have been committing horrible acts of commission and omission in the name of religious creeds and God. Despite this, it is said that the so-called all-powerful, all-good, and all knowing God remains silent. Therefore, God’s silence is equated with God’s non-existence by materialists and atheists.

Howeveer, the wonderful structure of the universe and of the things and beings in the universe does seem to suggest the existence of a Grand Design, which needs explanation. Can it be due to matter and motion? Though human reason is capable of understanding a lot, it points to the existence of Universal Consciousness or Cosmic Intelligence, and this, say nay-sayers, is more faith than fact.

The theistic world view gives cosmic support to the believers. After all, the question of all questions is whether the universe is friendly or inimical to life in general and human life in particular. Long before the ‘Sun’ in the solar system was seen as the friend of humans. So the believer bowed before the Sun and said, “Aum Mitrya Namah” – O Lord, I bow to you, our friend. Darwin’s theory of biological evolution is a grand hypothesis to explain the origin of species on this planet. He never claimed that he could explain the ‘arrival of life to evolve in favour of the fittest’ in the world. How did the rudimentary amoebas evolve; out of nothing? Biologists aver the principle ‘life begets life’. Can they reduce biology to physics? Can they accept biology as a branch of physics? The usual and answer to this is ‘no’. Moreover, physics itself is becoming a science of the minute following the discovery that atoms can be split! The concept of God is not a stupid idea. It cannot be done away with so cursorily. It was the agnostic H Spencer who applied the concept of evolution to the evolution of the cosmos. Later philosophers formulated different ideas of evolution, as did S Alexander in the idea of Emergent Evolution, H Bergson in the concept of Creative Evolution.

The tiny logic and intellect of man should not be elevated to the status of God or the Cosmic Intelligence; perhaps its role in human affairs ought not to be dismissed or underestimated. Such a stand has its own limitations.   German philosopher Kant refuted the traditional rational argument addressed in support of belief in God. Yet he formulated the Moral Argument. For belief in the existence of God – and morality are special to human beings. Unless we accept the moral in the universe it is very difficult to make the universe morally intelligible. The discussion cannot be left in the hands of priests and pundits. Education in humanities will help believers liberate religion from the clutches of the priestly class. For aren’t modern liberation theologians willing to learn from Karl Marx to solve the issue of hunger and injustice?

Courtesy: Speaking Tree

What is Death?

Life is in living. It is not a thing, it is a process. There is no way to attain to life except by living it, except by being alive, by flowing, streaming with it. If you are seeking the meaning of life in some dogma, in some philosophy, in some theology, that is the sure way to miss life and meaning both.

Quotes for Death

What is death?

The second thing to remember is: once you know what life is, you will know what death is. Death is also part of the same process. Ordinarily, we think death comes at the end; ordinarily we think death is against life; ordinarily we think death is the enemy. But death is not the enemy. And if you think of death as the enemy, it simply shows that you have not been able to know what life is.

Death and life are two polarities of the same energy, of the same phenomenon—the tide and the ebb, the day and the night, the summer and the winter. They are not separate and not opposites, not contraries; they are complementariness. Death is not the end of life; in fact, it is a completion of one life, the crescendo of one life, the climax, the finale. And once you know your life and its process, then you understand what death is.

Breathe in, breathe out

Death is an organic, integral part of life, and it is very friendly to life. Without it, life cannot exist. Life exists because of death; death gives the background. Death is, in fact, a process of renewal. And death happens each moment. The moment you breathe in and the moment you breathe out, both happen.

Breathing in, life happens; breathing out, death happens. That’s why when a child is born the first thing he does is breathe in, then life starts. And when an old man is dying, the last thing he does is breathe out, then life departs. Breathing out is death, breathing in is life—they are like two wheels of a bullock cart. You live by breathing in as much as you live by breathing out. The breathing out is part of breathing in. You cannot breathe in if you stop breathing out. You cannot live if you stop dying.

The man, who has understood what his life is, allows death to happen; he welcomes it. He dies each moment and each moment he is resurrected. His cross and his resurrection are continually happening as a process. He dies to the past each moment and he is born again and again into the future.

Ego and death are opposites

If you really want to live you have to be ready to die. Who is afraid of death in you? Is life afraid of death? It is not possible. How can life be afraid of its own integral process? Something else is afraid in you. The ego is afraid in you. Life and death are not opposites; ego and death are opposites. Life and death are not opposites; ego and life are opposites. Ego is against both life and death. The ego is afraid to live and the ego is afraid to die. It is afraid to live because each effort, each step towards life, brings death closer. If you live, you are coming closer to dying. The ego is afraid to die, hence it is afraid to live also. The ego simply drags.

Death completes life

Let it be remembered that death and life both become aflame together, they are never separate. If you are very, very minimally alive, at the minimum, then you can see death and life as being separate. The closer you come to the peak, the closer they start coming. At the very apex, they meet and become one. In love, in meditation, in trust, in prayer, wherever life becomes total, death is there. Without death, life cannot become total.

Courtesy: Complete Well-Being

A story about “Be aware of death and do not be afraid to die”

Enjoy life as though you are to die the next day

Once a young man from a rich business family went to meet a Spiritual Guru. He was restless in life and had a lot of stress in him. He was told that this Spiritual Guru was a true preceptor and would find a solution for him to get out of restlessness and stress.

The young man prostrated before the Spiritual Guru and asked, “Swamiji (A swami sometimes abbreviated “Sw.” is a religious teacher in Hinduism), how come I am always stressed and not at peace, while all you Spiritual Gurus are not?”

Swamiji said, “That stress will never bother you my son because tomorrow you will never be alive to ask this kind of questions.”

The young man was stunned he asked, “Do you mean to say I will die tomorrow?”

“Yes” said the Spiritual Guru calmly.

The young man was told that whatever the Spiritual Guru told would happen. He got up and started to go.

Swamiji asked, “Why young man what happened? You seem to be disturbed you have 24 hours to go.”

Young man pleaded, “Swamiji, please let me go time is short I need to meet all my near and dear ones.”

When you fall sick, Family, Friends, Relatives take care of you not the Job in which you forget your Family, Friends and Relatives

Young man reached home did not disclose to anyone that he has only 24 hours to be on this earth. He talked to all his relatives and friends and contacted everyone he knew and the next day mentally prepared to die and tried to remain in peace contemplating death.

Next day he was surprised to see the Spiritual Guru standing at the door of his room.

“We have another hour to go shall we talk.” asked the Spiritual Guru.

Young man nodded his head reaming unusually calm.

“In the past 23 hours did you feel stressed?” asked the Swamiji.

“How ridiculous, I have had little time to meet my dear and near ones I had no time to think of anything to get stressed.” said the Young man.

“Young Man, I know you could not get stressed because you were not involved in your business for past 23 hours.” said the Swamiji.

“But I am not at peace because I will die in a hour.” said the Young man.

“You are right young man you are not stressed because you did not ignore death, but you are not at peace because you fear death. Ignoring death altogether is living a lie. Fearing death is   Abhinivesha (clinging to life) one of the afflictions of Mind. So ignoring death or fearing death is both same a mental illness. What is needed for a person is to be aware of death. I don’t know who will die when. But understanding the truth about death can be very enlightening.”

“Swamiji, the awareness of death made me inactive and I was not interested to work.” said the Young Man.

“As I told you were not aware of death instead you feared death for the last 23 hours. A person who is aware of death will work as if there is no tomorrow but earn as if there is tomorrow. The earning which you are making is not for the work you are doing now says Karma Siddhanta. If it was true then everyone who works hard had to be rewarded appropriately.” explained Swamiji.

“So what I am earning now is not for the work I am doing now? But is it not my desire to earn more making me work?” asked the Young man.

“Yes on the surface it looks like desire to earn more the driving force for every person to work hard. So we need to put our effort to do our part. But earning more or less does not depend on the work done now. Sometimes sincerely done work many not yield better returns may be you do not deserve, while some jobs done with little efforts could pour good returns may be you deserve it. You may get more than you desire but you will never get less than you deserve, but you need to do your work sincerely without doubt.” said the Swamiji.

“Thank you Swamiji, you have showed me the path I will work without my eye on the result.” saying so the young man took the blessings of the Swamiji. And started a new life from there on.

Source: Speaking Tree

Problems with no Solutions

Syed Usman Haniel
Syed Usman Haniel

 Problems with no solutions

How many times have you noticed people driving their cars in a rage, often slapping the steering wheel and saying, “Oh! Its always buoy!” You may see a person walking in the street, no-one can bear to speak to him, he is so annoyed he keeps repeating, “Oh! It’s so hot!” If you were his colleague working in the same office, it would be a trial for you to have to see him every day. He always distracts you saying, “O man, the work is so much! Oh, when will they increase our salaries?” He arrives frowning and leaves resentful.

Sometimes, he complains of pains in his body or his son’s bad behaviour. In short, we should all realise that there are problems in our lives with absolutely no solution, and that the only way to deal with them is by taking things easy. Yes, enjoy your life! Beware of allowing your difficult situation to impact on your behaviour at work, with your children, your colleagues, etc. What have they done to deserve such punishment for problems which they played no part in, nor are able to provide solutions to? Do not let them associate grief and sadness with you each time they see or remember you.

This is why the Prophet forbade one from wailing over the dead, screaming, tearing up clothes, and shaving the head, etc. Why? Because the way to deal with the dead is by washing the body, covering it in a shroud, praying over it, then burying it in the grave and praying for the deceased. Screaming and wailing serves no purpose, except that it turns the joy of life into grief.

Once al-Ma’afi bin Sulayman was walking with his companion, and his companion turned to him, frowned and said, “How cold it is today!”

Al-Ma’afi said,“Have you warmed up now?’ “No”, he replied.

Al-Ma’afi said,“So what was the point of complaining? If you had glorified Allah, at least it would have been better for you.” And how accurate was his understanding and wisdom!

Live your life…

Check this Video Out:

Do not expose problems you are unaware of, and do not

expound on small matters. Simply continue to enjoy your life.