The Pain Of Being In Love With Someone Who Will Never Love You Back

Love is the best teacher. From it, you will learn more than you could possibly ever learn in a classroom or from a book. The reason for this is rather simple — we feel more when we’re in love.

Human beings learn through their senses as well as through the way they process and interpret the information taken in by those senses.

When we find ourselves in love, the chemicals released by our brains paired with the emotional sensations we experience allow us to experience life in hyper drive. We feel more alive and take in more of the world around us.

Being in love is the greatest high on the planet. It’s the most natural of highs, as it’s produced by our own bodies, as well as being the longest lasting high on the planet.

It increases our senses and allows us to both take in more information and process that information under a more positive light.

Our imaginations tend to get the best of us when we’re in love, creating alternative realities where our fantasies are born. Love helps us both focus more on the world around us while basically forcing us to spend more time in our own heads.

Until you fall in love, you don’t know what it means to live. Well, to be more exact, until you fall in love and have your heart broken, you don’t know what it means to live. Furthermore, until you have your heart broken, you won’t understand what it means to truly love.

As human beings, we learn best from loss. We come to understand the importance and value of both people and things, by losing them.

Sure, we can imagine how it must feel to lose a person we love, but until we actually lose, or are at risk of losing, this person, we never fully understand how important he or she is to us.

We learn by losing. We learn when we are beaten by others, when our best efforts aren’t good enough, when we don’t make the cut, and when we fail. Success is no teacher. In fact, success can often do more harm than good — especially when it wasn’t worked for or earned.

But loss… when you lose something, you instantly become aware of the now vacant space in your life that was once filled with something beautiful — even if that something beautiful was only the dream of having that which you now know you won’t have. And it hurts.

Love can teach you just about everything you need to know about life. For example, it can teach you that sometimes no matter how much you love a person, that person simply won’t love you back.

It can teach you that there are many levels to loving and that each and every person loves a little differently. It can also teach you that sometimes you have no choice but to love someone who will never love you as much as you love him or her.

We often talk about unconditional love, as if it were a real thing. The truth is that there is no such thing as unconditional love; we all love conditionally. However, having someone love you back is not one of those necessary conditions.

In fact, we often fall in love and continue to love those who don’t love us back as passionately. We all love that which we can’t have, and if we find someone that doesn’t want us it only makes us more desperate to have that someone.

That’s a bitch, ain’t it? You fall in love with someone who doesn’t love you back and knowing he or she is trying to push you away only makes you want to latch on tighter. The more that person tells you he or she doesn’t want you, the more your imagination concocts ways of making that person fall for you.

I speak from experience… as people, we are capable of chasing the person we are in love with for years and years on end to no avail. Every time we are turned down, we fall in love a little deeper. Or so we think.

Most of us have a difficult time distinguishing between romantic love and love itself. Romantic love is more a sort of obsession than it is anything else, and it’s romantic love that makes us want that which we can’t have.

Romantic love is what turns our imaginations on high and makes it impossible to start thinking about that one special person. The best part of it all is that we love being in love romantically, no matter how much it hurts.

Being in love with someone who will never love you as much as you love him or her shakes you to your core, but you love it. Don’t get me wrong, it hurts. It hurts a whole lot. At the same time, it makes you feel more alive. It makes you feel more “in the moment.”

It opens you up to a side of life and a side of yourself that you didn’t previously know existed. It’s the sort of pain that you never forget, but at the same time look back at with a sort of fondness and sense of nostalgia.

There’s a fine line between pain and pleasure. Romantic love walks that line.

Courtesy: Elite Daily

4 Reasons Why Falling In Love Is The Beginning And End Of Everything

4 Reasons Why Falling In Love Is The Beginning And End Of Everything

There is no high like falling in love with another person — it’s incomparable to any other human phenomenon. You will never feel as good as you do when you’re in love.

Life will never seem as beautiful as it does when you’re in love. And you will never be happier than when you’re in love. You’ll also never feel more pain than when you find yourself in love.

Being in love is the climax of life; it embodies everything it means to be alive to the fullest.

My life, as I’m sure many of yours are as well, is basically divvied up into sections divided by women. Each significant chapter in my life has a bit of a love story. Some love stories are short-lived, but others will leave a lasting impression on your person.

It’s said that people don’t like change, and while that may usually be the case, falling in love is an exception. Not only do people enjoy the changes that are associated with falling for a person, they desire them.

Falling in love isn’t just starting a new chapter in your life.

It’s starting a new life entirely. What people often fail to realize is that the moment you fall in love is the moment you stop being the person that you were. You change. Think about what makes you, you.

Sure, you have all the physical attributes. But more importantly, what makes you the person you are, is the way that you experience and interpret the world around you.

What makes you the unique individual you are isn’t just your looks or your abilities. It isn’t even only the experiences you’ve had and the things you’ve seen. What makes you the person that you are right now is the way you experience the world and how you interpret that which you experience.

That which you give most importance to and that which you find to be trivial are the two things that define the person that you are. Falling in love causes you to shift your entire perspective. It changes you because it changes the entire way that you see the world.

Love isn’t just blinding. It’s also revealing.

It reveals you to yourself. Falling in love feels like a new beginning because that’s exactly what it is. When you fall in love for the first time, you get to meet yourself for the first time in your life.

You experience emotions and thoughts that you never before could believe existed inside you. You see your vulnerability and your need for having a particular person in your life. The moment you fall in love is the moment you realize you aren’t enough.

We all “know” that people need other people in their lives in order to be happy, but not until you fall in love do you realize how deep that need goes. Nor do you realize how far you will go to get the person you desire.

Falling in love makes us do things, say things and believe things we never expected we’d be capable of doing, saying, believing. It pushes us to extremes we may not have even thought we were capable of. It can, and often does, also introduce us to a much darker side of the soul.

Love isn’t all rainbows and butterflies — where there is light, there is darkness looming around the bend.

If love was all good feelings and happiness then — let’s be honest — we wouldn’t find it nearly as intriguing as we do. It’s because we know the dark path that loving often leads us on that we find ourselves so entranced. Just as love reveals all the good in you, it also reveals all the bad. It reveals the darkness that lies in your soul.

We all have that darkness inside us — we just aren’t familiar with it until we’ve loved. We find ourselves fighting this inner struggle of selfishness and selflessness, a fight that more often than not leads to everyone losing and no one winning.

We try to both be independent and at the same time a part of a bigger whole. We get confused. Find ourselves lost and questioning the new reality that falling in love has created for us. Is it real? Or is it all just an illusion?

Imagine… falling in love builds you an entirely new world, an entirely new reality, a new truth. Then, down the line when things get more complicated and less black and white, we begin to lose sight of that novel reality. It all begins to get fuzzy and our uncertainty punishes us; it hurts.

It hurts to think that the love of you life, your world, isn’t what you believed it to be. It hurts to even think that everything that you’ve believed to be true may have all been in your imagination. The life you’ve just begun is about to end and a newer, darker version of you begins to take form.

Every time we fall in love, we start a cycle of beginning and ending, of rebirth and death.

The person you are changes as the way you perceive your love changes. As the way you look at your lover changes over the years, so does the person that you’ve become. Not every love must necessarily end in darkness, but I’d argue that your first love necessarily does.

If falling in love the first time and failing to keep the love alive doesn’t change you a few shades darker, then you probably haven’t yet experienced love.

Life and love are beautiful because of the seemingly paradoxical contrasts they allow for. With beauty there is ugliness. With light there is darkness. With pleasure there is pain. With life there is death.

Falling in love teaches you that without one, you can’t have the other. This is what makes relationships so damn complicated. Yet, it’s also what makes falling in love so perfect.

Courtesy: Elite Daily

10 Ways To Determine If Someone Loves You

She Loves Me, He Loves Me Not: 10 Ways To Determine If Someone Loves You

If you’re reading this right now, I believe it was through no coincidence your last Google search was something along the lines of “Does he love me?” Well, how do you know if someone loves you?

It’s easier than you might think:

1. He or she listens.

When someone loves you, he or she will always listen intently because every word you say is yet another bullet point in the quest to better understand you. Conversations will revolve around coffee, not six tequila shots; if someone loves you, you can bet he or she wouldn’t want the quality of your conversation to be diluted by any outside factor.

2. He or she loves you for who you are.

When someone loves you, he or she loves you even if you smell like eau de sweat. He or she will love you all the same even if you have seaweed stuck between your teeth. The only difference is, he or she will whisper softly into your ear to inform you of that incriminating seaweed as he or she reaches in to peck you lightly on the cheek.

3. He or she pushes you to better yourself.

Because this person loves you, he or she believes you’re worth so much more than you’ve set out to achieve. Sometimes, it gets tough as tempers flare due to mounting pressures. You may feel like you’re up against impossible expectations, but more often than not, this person will help you do better in the future.

This is the part where your love for him or her gets puts to the test as you question why he or she is pushing you so hard. The answer is, in his or her eyes, you’re worth so much more than this.

4. Your insecurities matter to him or her.

It could be the five pounds you gained when you first discovered the cronut, or it could be that f*cked up haircut you got from that dodgy neighborhood hair salon that was having a $10 promo. But when someone loves you, you always see your worries reflect in this person’s eyes as you confide in him or her. He or she will never immediately shrug off your fears, or worse, laugh them off.

5. He or she is honest with you.

You can always count on this person to tell you the truth; at some point, it becomes sheer obligation. This person will tell you like it is because he or she doesn’t want you making the wrong choices.

6. He or she makes an effort to understand.

This goes for everything you say, even if it doesn’t make sense to this person at first. You should also remember it’s important to be upfront and not beat around the bush when it comes to something serious. Additionally, there’s a difference between understanding and being patronizing. When someone loves you, he or she will make an effort to understand the reasons behind the things you say or do.

Your signifiant other may not always agree with you, but he or she will always try to evaluate and reason with you because he or she knows there’s more to a relationship than winning arguments.

7. You can see it in his or her eyes.

You know the corny phrase, “Your eyes are the windows to your soul”? It’s true, and pretty much common sense. If this person confesses his or her love for you, but his or her eyes are scarily detached and words feel hollow, run for your life!

8. He or she is receptive to and respectful of your family and friends.

This can be rather subjective; however, I suppose unless you hail from an abusive background or your friends are crackheads who snort cocaine as much as you inhale oxygen, there’s really no basis for this person to be a douche and disrespect your loved ones.

9. Words become noticeably plural.

First thing’s first: I’m not an advocate of trashy PDA, nor am I telling you to become a physical extension of your lover. You can remain singular; in fact, please do. What I mean to illustrate here is that when someone is in love with you, the things he or she says naturally become inclusive of you. You become a part of this person’s plans and he or she genuinely wants to build a future with you.

There needs to be a balance here, though, because while co-dependency is sweet, neediness is not. Sounds like rocket science? Welcome to monogamy.

10. He or she will always make you feel special.

I’m not sure about you, but I’m extremely picky and don’t believe in jumping into relationships or being with someone for the sole purpose of companionship. If I wanted companionship, I’d get a pet.

Don’t get me wrong here because I’m not judging against others who do, but I do believe that when someone loves you wholeheartedly, he or she will go out of his or her way to make you feel special in many little ways. It could be getting out of bed slightly earlier to make you breakfast, caressing your face while gazing into your eyes during those intimate moments or simply just sticking around whenever you’re feeling down.

When you mean that much to someone, you can rest assured that you’ll be ranking high on this person’s priority list and it will always feel effortless.

Courtesy: Elite Daily

The Truth Behind Cheating

The Truth Behind Cheating

We’ve all been cheated on, and we all know someone being cheated on right now. But we don’t say anything about it. We choose not to tell them. Why? Is it because we fear of getting in the middle? Or is it because we fear that if we tell that person, they won’t believe it anyway, leaving us looking like a jealous a-hole?

Cheating is different for men than it is for women. Women cheat because they are lacking something in their relationship, they don’t feel loved or appreciated so they seek that from another man. It’s all based on emotion and a happy girl will hardly ever stray. But this is not the case with men, happy men stray all the time.

Men cheat because they can. They know that we won’t do anything about it. They aren’t missing anything in their relationship, in fact most of the time they really do love their girlfriends. But it’s just about sex. They don’t care about the girls they have relations with, they just cheat because they can.

Their world doesn’t stop, they don’t feel bad about it, and they certainly don’t feel any differently about you. Their life just goes on as if it never happened. They have some sort of on/off cheating switch when it comes to this. They are able to be so deceptive yet they can go back to being that loving boyfriend after the dirty deed has been done.

But please, don’t get it twisted. Women are not so innocent in this either. It takes two to tango hunny! If these “side chicks” had more respect for themselves, men wouldn’t be able to cheat, it wouldn’t even be a possibility for them. But there’s always going to be those women out there that are willing to be the side-screw and have no hard feelings about it.

The Successful Cheater: You might be in a “happy” relationship right now, meanwhile your partner has OTHER partners. Well congrats, you’re being successfully cheated on. But what are some of the signs?


Hidden Facebook Relationship Status.

Yes you’re probably in most of their photos so you think this is okay, but it is easy to tell someone, “Oh that’s just my ex, I haven’t gotten to delete those old photos yet.”

A whole laundry list of sexual encounters prior to you.

Please don’t try to tell me that your once overly-promiscuous partner has turned over a new leaf and stays faithful to only you. A person that will sleep with practically anything with a pulse doesn’t tend to have many morals. So don’t think that for one millisecond that they can change. Because chances are, they can’t. And they will continue to do so behind your back.

Random names of the same sex in their contacts.

For instance, your cheating boyfriend isn’t going to put his new fling “Rachel” in his contacts. He’s going to put her under the name “Bob from work” and call it a day. Meanwhile he doesn’t even know a Bob and he doesn’t even have a job. I mean come on.

Wherever they go, their phone goes with them.

If they are seeing someone behind your back, they are not going to leave their phone alone with you. So if the next time your girlfriends phone rings and she busts through the plate glass in the shower to get to it before you do, there you go.

If your partner spends way more time with their friends than they do with you, chances are they are probably up to no good.

If they love you and are faithful to you, then they want to be with you as much as possible, period.

Everyone you know always has something negative to say about them.

Chances are, they know something that you don’t. And instead of telling you the truth, they beat around the bush with it because they know you wouldn’t believe it if it came down to it.

The root of the issue at hand is respect. A person that cheats doesn’t respect their partner, that’s the bottom line. And the women and men willing to be the “side piece” have no self-respect. Instead of demanding to be the ONLY one, they settle with being the OTHER one.

Then we have the people who literally do not have the slightest clue what is going on behind their back because they choose to ignore the signs and live by the phrase, “Ignorance is Bliss.” But is ignorance bliss?? Maybe if we all just had some old fashioned respect for ourselves and each other, this wouldn’t be such a prominent issue.

Courtesy: Elite Daily